This gets talked about a lot in my fitness challenges, but rarely with other areas of life, and I think it’s so important we talk about it (even though it's something you may not want to hear).
I can’t tell you how many times someone has posted in one of my challenge groups about how upset they are because they’re seeing amazing results, they feel great, and the people in their lives who they thought would be the most supportive aren't. In fact, not only are they not supportive, they're usually demeaning. “You’ve changed”, “You’re just stuck on yourself now”, “You’re obsessed”. A lot of people will hear “You’re too skinny”, when they are well within a healthy weight. “You looked better before”. It’s mind blowing the negative comments I’ve heard said to both myself and people in my challenge groups, and almost every time it goes back to one thing, them and how they feel about themselves. This has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. These people see you changing your life for the better, and it forces them to look at their own lives and the things they’re not happy about, but not yet willing to change. They make excuses for themselves “I could never do…”, “It’s easy for you”, “I don’t have the time, money, whatever to do that”, when in reality, where there’s a will there’s a way. If it’s something they want bad enough, they will find a way to do it.
I can’t tell you how many times someone has posted in one of my challenge groups about how upset they are because they’re seeing amazing results, they feel great, and the people in their lives who they thought would be the most supportive aren't. In fact, not only are they not supportive, they're usually demeaning. “You’ve changed”, “You’re just stuck on yourself now”, “You’re obsessed”. A lot of people will hear “You’re too skinny”, when they are well within a healthy weight. “You looked better before”. It’s mind blowing the negative comments I’ve heard said to both myself and people in my challenge groups, and almost every time it goes back to one thing, them and how they feel about themselves. This has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. These people see you changing your life for the better, and it forces them to look at their own lives and the things they’re not happy about, but not yet willing to change. They make excuses for themselves “I could never do…”, “It’s easy for you”, “I don’t have the time, money, whatever to do that”, when in reality, where there’s a will there’s a way. If it’s something they want bad enough, they will find a way to do it.
I see the same thing happen in other areas of people’s lives, too. When I post about traveling I’m sure there are some people who say to themselves “It must be nice, she doesn’t have kids, I could never do that”, not realizing that the majority of the people I travel with do have kids, and have overcome some incredible obstacles, including bankruptcy and major health scares, to be able to do what they're doing now. Instead of letting their situation define them, they let it empower them. If someone is a successful coach I often hear people say “it’s because they have a good upline coach and I don’t”, completely ignoring the fact that some of the top coaches in the company have no active upline coach and have been very successful. They don’t have secrets, they have drive and determination. They don’t sit back and wait for someone to tell them what to do, or throw a pity party because they’re not getting the help they think they deserve, they’re going out and making it happen. They don’t let their excuses get in the way of the things they want to accomplish.
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Here’s a good test to see if you’re living to your potential and making things happen, or if you’re making yourself a victim, blaming others and making excuses. When you see someone post something positive on facebook like a vacation, losing weight, a promotion at work, a new house, what’s the very first feeling you get in your gut. Is it happiness? Jealousy? If the first thing you think is “why not me?” then it’s time to look on the inside and change the way you view the world around you. You can either let people’s successes inspire you, or shut you down with envy. Your thoughts define your life, choose wisely!
It's so important that you live YOUR life according to YOUR priorities. If someone else doesn't approve, that's on them, not you. If this has helped you, or you know someone who's going through this right now, please share this with them!
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